Cancer Hits Home

This past year Christine, my wife, experienced the interesting and painful experience with Cancer. Her mom, who lives in Texas, was diagnosed with brain, spinal and lung cancer. It has been a confussing year of understanding cancer, frustration with Dr's and just plain not understanding what God is doing through all of this. Fortunately, we have been able to send Christine to Texas a few times to spend intimate time with her mother. She is still in treatment and still we are not sure what is going on and if she is getting better.

Well tonight I got a sobering call from my mother in California. My mom and dad were just out in Colorado this past week and it was great seeing them again. My dad received some bad news from his Dr. He was diagnosed with prostrate cancer. I'm not really sure how to respond or feel. Having your mother-in-law with cancer is one thing and it is horrible. But having my dad, the steady, patient, encouraging servant in my life, find out that he has cancer seems totally unfair. I want to be the rock for him. I want to be the one who brings hope and helps our family fix our eyes on Jesus. But at the same time I don't know what to do.

These past two weeks I have been attending our Campus Crusade National Staff conference and it started out with our staff family just being honest with God, sharing our hurts, bringing before God and each other our pains and sufferings. A close friend of mine two weeks ago lost their baby in utero at 36 weeks. Another of our friends here in Boulder lost their 12 year old daugher in a horse accident. None of this is perfect. This isn't suppossed to happen. And through all of this I try to relate but don't quite understand how to feel or what my friends are going through.
My brain tells me to be a rock. My theology says that God is good and all will be okay.

At my friends daughter's memorial they sung the song, Blessed be Your Name by Matt Redman
Blessed be your name
In the land that is plentiful
Where the streams of abundance flow
Blessed be your name

Blessed be your name
When I'm found in the desert place
Though I walk through the wilderness
Blessed be your name

Every blessing you pour out,
I turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say...

Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be your glorious name
Blessed be your name
When the sun's shining down on me
When the world's all as it should be
Blessed be your name

Blessed be your name
On the road marked with suffering
Oh, There's pain in the offering
Blessed be your name

Every blessing you pour out,
I turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say...
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be your glorious name

You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to stay
Lord Blessed be your name


This is how I want to respond. This is how I want to live. When the good and bad come, my response will always be Blessed by your name.

This will be an interesting adventure. I take comfort in knowing that my savior, Jesus, fully understands me, fully knows what my dad is going through and fully has us all in His hands.